I want to hug god,
Through the silence of the night,
At the madness of the run,
As he always did,
I want to hug god,
When the cold air is cold,
And all the places feel right.. empty,
Only i wasn’t alone enough to see,
Until i saw my heart, walking on two legs.
I wonder how long it’s been,
The sun kissed words that came out,
Unexpected,
Maybe it saw me,
Far from god, you, me,
Not ending any circle,
Always holding every pillow,
Never good but to food,
Ever learning the never learning,
At winter’s summer nights,
Did she leave me,
Because i left myself?
And god won’t leave, and you won’t leave,
And i can’t but cry..
And kick myself to keep from crying,
And cry..
And kick myself to keep from crying,
As i get washed by revelations,
Of beautiful life,
Of blessed life,
Always fair and full,
Always kept, changed, and rolling..
I want to hug him anyway,
When they can’t bet on him,
Nor on me,
So tell me,
When there’s no start to start,
Where to go with it all?
When my heart can’t take it?
Which path to pass?
At 25 or so..
I want to hug god through a crowded market,
At dawn prayers,
When I’m no longer alone,
At war times that left,
Yet they never go,
At earthly times never enough,
Never end,
Always full.
I want to hug god,
Before shooting a hole to my heart,
Of flowers,
The heart that knew him,
But i didn’t,
To a hole that was always there,
But i wasn’t,
Only he was.
Then we prayed on the same grave,
With two heart, two hands,
So our two eyes couldn’t hold to look,
To see us,
Hugging god,
Far away from ourselves,
Always far, at home,
That was kneeling on colors we only saw.
My heart was back to me again,
Found both a hole,
And a pine tree, that he later choose,
So now i run,
With two legs,
As you walk,
With two legs, and two hearts,
On colors we only saw,
Then my heart decided another roll,
Choose the hole again,
Found a willow tree,
Layed on its shadows,
And walked with it,
For god was on the corner of its sun,
The only place now,
Where i can hug him,
Where you walk, with two hearts,
As two trees,
Of the same color,
Where I’m standing silently,
Wanting to hug god,
You saw it all.
zaki monzer 