The world outside is either celebrating or fighting on and event ,
Independence and victorious event ,
And amidst all this i didn’t find my part
So i tried searching for my part , i tried feeling belonging , but i couldn’t,
And i asked again , myself , the one not feeling , and the one feeling :
Why should i call my birthplace, the country I’ve been born into , a home ?
I have no obligations
I don’t call it so
I don’t feel any attachment whatsoever to it ,
Nor it’s people , nor it’s ideas and nor it’s ideologies.
I don’t belong to any certain land , any certain limitation , to any certain group or to any certain country ,
I’m from the ground to the ground ,
And I’m a piece of it,
While everyone is fighting over who’s the coolest over it..
I tried feeling a sense of pride of many past accomplishments that happened then i wondered ,
Pride ain’t true ,
And i wasn’t there nor born ,
And i don’t know the people ,
And if i told myself i should feel proud or happy because of things other did then why ?
If the answer is because i share the same piece of land as them then I’m insane , or even the same religious stem ,
Then if i tried to think of it as an event of salvation or freedom then , are we ?
Are we ? No
Are we ? No
Are we ? Fr ? No
We’re slaves to ourselves before anything ,
To media ,
To many powers
Inner and outer
Without acknowledging it .
If i tried to feel happy because of the same righteous acts or ideologies i support then i should know that there barerly ain’t any of these anymore..
I can post and share and hallelujah
But i try to analyze , gaze and stay tru , without emotions kicking in.
Tbh i never celebrated any of holidays or events in my life , because i don’t believe in any , not my bday , time is merely a human construct and all these sets of events are limitations set , mostly don’t have meaning , why should i recognize and go with sth that i believe doesn’t have meaning ?
And I’m talking about 95% of events .
Time is an illusion
And as i don’t feel set for any place , that so to any date , that so to any ideology i can change…
I don’t celebrate simply because i don’t belong, i don’t belong because i don’t understand , i don’t understand because i don’t feel and i don’t so because there’s simply no belonging , to feel like something outer resonates with your inner world , or that something from outer is helping your inner vision of what’s true or right , i don’t go with anything as a home , or event , or worth enjoying , except two things , one is all things , because i belong to these rivers and mountains and trees and sunlight and many infinite moments in these space time dimensions , and i feel i belong there , without what’s the country of them called , without people , whithout the vision of others , i belong to whatever my self dives into , and two is the quraan , cause if there would be any definite place , set , country , time , then quraan is home , islam is home , is the way , the path , the house , the unknown to many , the felt by few , the understood by counted , the lived by lost yet found people and hearts , such as prophets , the ones i call my best friend , the long time long space friends of mine , in god , in eternity , in all days , and all events … ❤
zaki monzer 